I don’t know! Please just be quiet for a second!”
If you’ve ever found yourself on the verge of exploding in the face of the 1001 questions thrown your way (and within the span of a few minutes), we totally get you! Let’s take a moment and shift our focus to the positive side of things; reminding ourselves that those never-ending questions are a sign of our children’s curiosity and desire to learn about the world around them. As parents and the recipients of those endless questions, we have plenty of opportunities to nurture their inquisitive minds and foster a love of learning.
Together with Nexus International School, we share tips on managing your child’s queries, encouraging them to ask more meaningful questions, and conversation prompts and activities that spark curiosity and connection.
Managing Your Child’s Questions
A child’s ‘why’ is prelude to the ‘why’ of a scientist, artist, or historian. Likewise, the child’s ‘how’ looks toward the engineer, or politician, or manufacturer.“ (David Perkins, author of Futurewise)
If you’re still struggling with your child’s “why”s and “how”s, here are some ways you can help them grow:
1. Replace your “I don’t know”s with “Let’s find out”: Show your child that it’s okay not to know all the answers and that learning is a lifelong process. Encourage their curiosity by involving them in the search for answers. Make it a fun activity by researching together online, checking out books from the library, or asking experts and other people around you.
2. Provide a safe and supportive environment: Be your child’s safe space. Create a space where your children will feel comfortable to ask any questions without fear of judgment. Be aware of cues that you may show, such as exasperated tones, or surprise at any perceived gaps in your child’s knowledge.
3. Don’t jump in with the answers immediately: Allow for a longer pause after your child asks a question. Oftentimes, your kids will end up coming up with their own answers. A child could also simply be thinking aloud, and trying to make sense of situations by themselves. Allow them the space to figure things out independently.
4. Ask follow-up questions: When your child asks you a question, try asking follow-up questions, which will show that questions don’t have to end with a single answer. This will also encourage deeper thinking about the topic at hand. For example, you could spark a conversation with a child, responding to their original question of “Why is the sky blue?” with “Is it always blue? Why do you think the sky is a different colour at different times of the day?”.
5. Providing opportunities for discovery: Encourage your child to explore their environment and ask questions about the things they see and experience. This is the best time for meaningful questions to occur- questions that help your child continue to look at the world with wonder and curiosity, while honing their critical thinking skills.
Participating in programmes that allow for such opportunities, such as the Nexus Cubs Programme, is a great way to get our children curious, questioning, and making connections. Their Nature Detectives sessions allow for inquiry-based outdoor learning, with discussions on how natural resources are being used around us, while their Story Explorers sessions introduce children to different stories and cultures around the world. The focus in encouraging such critical thinking as a personal goal is evident in Nexus’s International Early Years Curriculum, with continuity in fostering this mindset all through the Primary years.
Forest school programmes have also been shown to nurture children’s curiosity by providing them with opportunities to explore and learn outdoors. Do keep a look out for Nexus International School’s upcoming forest school, which will be situated right by the campus itself!
6. Practice active listening: Pay attention to what your child is currently curious about (which, as we know, can change in the blink of an eye!). Discuss these topics with broader prompts, and show your genuine interest in their thoughts, questions, and ideas.
Keeping it Open-Ended
Our kids are often given step-by-step instructions and limiting rules as part of their learning activities. Let’s replace those structured answers and activities with open-ended ones, and provide our kids the opportunities to explore a variety of responses that would require deeper thinking and connections.
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Open-Ended Activities
Adding a twist or variation to classic games and activities is a fun way to spark curiosity and creativity. Guidelines are provided, but within much wider boundaries – which in turn encourages problem-solving skills and more meaningful questions and answers to take place.
1. Building Blocks: Aside from the classic “tallest tower activity”, you could also ask your child to build a bridge to support the weight of a toy car, or challenge them to build a maze and guide a small toy through the maze.
2. Imaginative Storytelling: Ask your child to create a story based on the characters of their favourite book, but with a completely different storyline. You can also get them to question the reason why they think characters are the way they are. This will help them practice taking on different perspectives, and also cultivate empathy.
For example, “Why do you think the Big Bad Wolf is always trying to blow down the three little pigs’ houses- are there other ways to solve his problem of being hungry?” “Can you rewrite the story so everyone ends up happy, including the wolf?” If your child enjoys storytelling and creative play, you could also check out the Nexus Cubs Programme’s Story Explorers sessions, which help to hone greater imagination through diverse stories.
3. Arts and Craft: Shift the focus to the process rather than the end result. Provide your child with a variety of materials such as paints, markers, paper, cereal boxes or string. Give them just one or two prompts (e.g. flower, car, dog), and follow their lead as they imagine, explore and invent!
4. Scavenger Hunt: Get your children looking for items that match certain descriptions or criteria, rather than a specific object.
For example, “Find something that can be folded”. Playing this game outdoors will have the added benefits of nature play, while also honing your child’s inner Sherlock Holmes. If your little one would like to have a taste of what it is like to be a Nature Detective, do check out the Nexus Cubs Programme, where kids get to play detective with inquiry-based outdoor activities.
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Open-Ended Prompts
Add these versatile phrases to your communication toolkit, and keep the conversation flowing. By modelling and asking your children thought-provoking questions, you will be helping them internalise and develop questioning skills to become independent, curious and self-directed learners. Some examples of questions you could ask include:
- “What would happen if we tried it this way instead?”
- “How can we make this more interesting/fun/creative?”
- “What do you think we could do differently next time?”
- “Why do you think that happened?”
- “Tell me more.”
- “I wonder…?”
If you would like examples of specific questions that are categorised by situation and age, you can find this in our earlier article: Conversation Prompts to Get the Kids Talking.
Remember to revisit
Of course, with all things said, we are mamas – often overworked, exhausted and stretched thin. There will definitely be days when all we want to do is to just provide a short, quick answer. And that’s completely okay! Don’t feel pressured to always have to jump into a full-scale meaningful conversation. You can always revisit those questions at a better time (when you don’t have gum stuck in your hair, a dirty nappy to change, and a near-exploding kitchen!). Just let your child know that they are heard, that their questions are important to you, and that you can, and will, address these questions at another time or day.
Good luck with those important conversations, #makchicmumsquad!
This is a sponsored post by Nexus International School.
If you would like to find out how Nexus International School can support your young children in becoming better questioners and curious learners, do join the Nexus Cub Programme sessions that run every Friday from 9:00 am to 10:00 am – perfect for little cubs between the ages of 2 to 3 years old. For more information or registration purposes, do enquire online, or contact the Admissions Team at 03-8889 3868 or admissions@nexus.edu.my.
