Throughout pregnancy, every parent dreams of a complication-free birth, resulting in a perfect, healthy baby. Sometimes, however, things just don’t work out that way. For parents who find themselves in the intense and stressful situation of having a child in the NICU (neonatal intensive care unit; a unit in a hospital for newborns needing special care, often because they arrive too early), here are some tips from parents of premature babies on how to make this difficult time a little easier for the entire family.
1. Familiarise Yourself with the Space
With all the worrying and strain that comes with a NICU stay, the last thing you need is the additional stress of being thrust into a whole new place. One way to ease the tension is by familiarising yourself with the NICU. In the same way most hospitals are able to arrange for a tour of the labour room beforehand, it’s worth asking if you can take a tour of the NICU as well. While it may be upsetting to think of your baby hooked up to the many machines and other equipment you may see around you, remember: It’s all for his or her own good.
2. Get to Know Your Care Team
With a child in the NICU, you’ll see your doctors and care team every day for a good amount of time. Get to know them, and check in with them continually to learn about your baby’s progress. It’s important that you all feel that you’re on the same team, and all working towards the day your little one gets to come home.
3. Rejoice in Every Little Progress
This tip comes courtesy of stay-at-home mom Megan Moscoco, 28, whose son was born eight weeks premature. It can be a long road to homecoming for NICU babies, so celebrating each little milestone and success can help make that light at the end of the tunnel shine brighter than ever. “My son went from drinking 3ml of milk to 5ml of milk,” says Megan, “And it seemed like a huge step!”
4. Build a Support Network
It can be easy to feel overwhelmed by all the cares and worries on your shoulders – How much did baby eat today? Is he doing better? When can he come home? The best thing you can do for yourself is to build a strong support system that can help you shoulder this burden – and that doesn’t just have to include family.
“I couldn’t have made it through without my supportive husband and my parents, says PhD student Foo Cheau Yee, 32, whose baby was born at just 26 weeks and less than 1kg. “But beyond that, my support network also included my doctors, nurses, friends, other preemie mommies from the hospital, and the Malaysian Miracle Babies group on Facebook.”
Megan agrees: “Try to connect with other parents in the NICU. They are the only ones who will truly understand what you are going through. My husband and I still keep in contact with two families we met there!”
5. Bond as Much as You Can
It goes without saying that NICU babies don’t get to spend as much time with mom and dad as other babies do – so make sure to take whatever time you can to bond and interact with your little one. “You have to stay strong and think positively, talk and touch the baby to give the baby positive energy,” says Cheau Yee.
6. Plan Ahead
You’ve made it! You’ve done your time in the NICU, and your little miracle is finally strong enough to go home. But be warned – transitioning from life in the NICU to life at home with a newborn is often when parents struggle the most. To ease that transition, stick to the two Ps: Predict and Prepare. Talk to your care team about any precautions or practices you need in place for baby at home. make sure you know how to contact your team in case of any emergencies, and be sure you have help when you get home. That way, if you need to devote your time to taking care of baby, there’s someone around to help handle everything else.
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After seven years in journalism and communications, Hanna Alkaf recently became a freelance writer and work-at-home mum so that she could be with her son Malik (before you ask, it was totally worth it).
Image Credit: TBG
