Essential Lists & Tips

When to Spill the Beans About Your Pregnancy

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I still remember the rush of beautiful emotions washing over me as the doctor confirmed my pregnancy. It was the sixth week into the beginning of a new life and the world just looked, felt, smelled and tasted different to me. An amazing kind of different. I wanted so much to share that joy with the world the same way I did when I experienced it for several months back.

Yes, this isn’t my first time.

I shared the news with the world immediately only to announce all things opposite some several weeks later, when my first pregnancy didn’t turn out viable. While it was an upsetting experience for us, there’s nothing I regret. Every tiny detail of the experience served as an amazing life lesson to us: it taught us love. It also taught us what may or may not be comfortable for us in making pregnancy announcements.

The journey to parenthood is filled with amazing riddles and learning curves. It even begins at the point of deciding the right time to spill our pregnancy beans.

I personally don’t believe in specific set rules on when to share the good news and with whom, but from experience, there are pros and cons to consider when making the decision.

The Pee Stick Announcement
It’s natural to want to share your joy, even more so in the heat of the moment. The biggest advantage to this would be the ability to have family and friends celebrating the news together. You’ll then get to continue your journey without having to conceal anything, nor give excuses when you’re not feeling well in social situations.

For those with severe morning sickness and have had to miss work more than expected, you may need to reveal your pregnancy early to your boss and co-workers. Another factor to consider is if your job involves any occupational exposures that may harm the baby.

Some women may not feel the need to hide anything early on and decide that if anything were to go wrong with their pregnancy, they’d have the support from their loved ones to endure it.

For most of women, early announcements come from immediate excitement and the natural inability to hold in such joy. It may go to the point of announcing on social media – some with photos of pee stick results and other creative ways.

However, an early announcement can put a pregnant woman in an unwanted situation. I remember when a friend asked me about my first pregnancy (after seeing my Facebook profile several weeks earlier) only to have me awkwardly explain my pregnancy loss.

The “Safe Zone”
There’s been some debate on when exactly is the “safe zone”, but most agreed that the risk of miscarriage drops significantly after the end of the first trimester. The risk drops further upon the detection of the baby’s heartbeat. Therefore some pregnant women may find it more comfortable to do the share the big news by the twelfth week.

This is not to say it’s entirely safe after that twelfth week mark, but the most fragile part is over and it’s a great time to share the happy news. You may after all begin to show by then, so there’s no more hiding the bump!

The “Right” Time
While there may not be a specific “right” time to announce, pregnant women may decide to tell different people at different times. It usually begins by announcing the great news to your other half (perhaps in some cute, surprising way) before informing your parents, parents-in-law, siblings and closest friends. From there on, you could have the “big tell” on social media which can be done in a funny way such as this couple’s rap video.

It’s okay if you don’t want to announce your pregnancy on social media. Just make sure those who know about your pregnancy be very careful not to mention it on Facebook or Instagram.

Such an amazing riddle it is just deciding when and how to spill the pregnancy beans. But at the end of it, the “right” time really is what feels best for us. So discuss it with your partners and have fun creating cute ways to tell people the reason to your glow!

Azalia Suhaimi is a corporate executive by day and a poet by night; juggling them while enjoying the much-treasured pregnancy to her first child. She hopes to tell beautiful poetic stories to her children someday.